Spirituality Game
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Midlife Happiness and Spirituality: is there a link?
Religion and spirituality is widespread
There are about 40 organized religious faith groups around the world, according to Religioustolerance.org. The major world religions, such as Buddhism, Christianity, Islam and Judaism to name a few, each have over three million followers. Millions of others practice spirituality in the form of meditation, prayer and contemplation.
Some Humor
Religiousness as well as spirituality is often the target of jokes. Well-known iconoclast Bill Maher tells this story of three women and their sons:
Three women are chatting about the qualities of their sons. The first one says:
“I am happy that he has decided to become a priest: Every time he enters a room, people look at him with respect and exclaim: ‘My father!’”
The eyes of the second woman shone and she commented:
“Well, I’m even happier to know that my son not only followed the priesthood but was appointed cardinal. So, when he comes into the room, people lower their heads in respect, kiss his hand and say: ‘Your Grace!’”
The third woman remains in silence. The other two turn to her and ask: “And what about your son?”
“Well, my son…is six feet tall and handsome, with fair hair and blue eyes. Every time he comes into a room, people look at one another and say: ‘My God!’”
Some Research
Researchers have studied extensively religiousness and spirituality. A growing body of psychological science is suggesting that religious (including spiritual) people are happier, healthier, and recover better after traumas than non-religious ones.
For example, 47 percent of people who report attending religious services several times a week describe themselves as “very happy,” versus 28 percent of those who attend less than once a month. Researchers don’t know why!
Psychologists at the University of British Columbia showed that spirituality was a more important contributing factor to children’s (8-12 years of age) happiness than religious practices.
Increased happiness in adults and adolescents correlated positively to spirituality (an inner belief system that a person relies on for strength and comfort) and religiousness (institutional religious rituals, practices, and beliefs).
The authors concluded that “enhancing personal meaning may be a key factor in the relation between spirituality and happiness.” Expressing and recording acts of kindness toward others as well as acts of altruism and volunteering may help to make children happier.
Contributing to Happiness
What does this have to do with midlife coping strategies? The same strategies apply to midlifers. Taking on a “game worth playing,” being fully engaged, quality relationships and being of service all contribute to mid age happiness. Perhaps there is no real difference amongst the religions; the spiritual principles are shared. Both religion and spiritual practice can contribute to happiness.
Sonja Lyubomirsky, author of The How of Happiness, speculates on the benefits of going to religious services on a weekly basis. She assumes that the regular ritual:
• comforts people in the face of hard times
• distracts them from stresses and hassles
• provides compassion for those less fortunate
• offers social and emotional support from other members
• affirms their identities, values, and lifestyle
• reinforces their meaning in life (e.g., “We are more than just a momentary blip in the universe”)
• gives inspiration, awe, and hope (e.g., “I can do this,” “I’m stirred to go help someone today or forgive my enemy or save the planet.”)
• is associated with a sense of control and strength in coping with challenges
• and likely much more.
Spiritual awareness
As people enter middle age, spirituality and/or religion become more important to them; they are part of the adult developmental process.
Frederic Hudson, author of The Adult Years: Mastering the Art of Self-Renewal notes:
“The second half of life is about moving beyond “ego” concerns into the life of the “self, a spiritual aspect of mature life. Through the conscious development of an inner self, we discover connections to universal qualities of life everywhere. This spiritual awareness transforms our sense of purpose, and we begin to pursue a higher consciousness characterized by wholeness, reflection, and trust – investing our energy in forms of life and work that will outlive us.”
Many thanks to Dr. Fred Horowitz for contributing to this article.
About the Author
Dr. Frank Bonkowski is passionate about midlife happiness and writes about career change, self-discovery, goal setting, education, and midlife crisis. He also teaches college-level English language and literature.Together with Dr. Fred Horowitz, he founded Happiness-After-Midlife, a leading site that offers midlifers and beyond a new paradigm of aging based on renewal and reinvention
It explores vital issues, such as happiness, learning, transition, relationships, giving back to the community, and encore work. Their site, /e-book.html”>Happiness-After-Midlife, features a daily blog, articles, bi-weekly pod casts, and weekly expert midlife interviews.
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